Solutions: short sentences exercises

Exercise 1

The sentences could be split as follows.

Sentence 1

• Any deviation of these requirements contained within the DCP will require a Development Application to be lodged with Council,
• accompanied with an Acoustic Report prepared by a suitably qualified and experienced acoustic consultant.

Sentence 2

• Through your studies and the industry experience available in many of our courses, you’ll be consistently aware of new developments within your chosen field,
• and you’ll make great professional contacts to help you build your career.

Sentence 3

• A true business grade service, the service can be used to help build your IP WAN or virtual private network (VPN),
• to provide your staff with remote access to central office sites.

Sentence 4

• Fridge Buyback started in August 2006
• and in two phases to July 2007 collected, degassed and recycled more than 3,650 fridges,
• resulting in estimated residential greenhouse emission reductions of over 33,000 tonnes CO2e, approximately 329,000 kilograms of metals recycled and electricity bill savings for participants of over $4.6 million.

Sentence 5

• If you are not satisfied with the decision made, you can refer this matter to Financial Ombudsman Service Limited,
• an independent and impartial body established to hear and endeavour to resolve complaints by the insuring public.

Exercise 2

The sentences could be rewritten as follows.

Sentence 1

Step 1: Write shorter sentences This advice has been prepared without considering your objectives, financial situation or needs. Before acting on the advice, consider its appropriateness to your circumstances. Step 2: Improve language and sentence length We prepared this advice without considering your goals, financial situation or needs. Before acting on it, make sure it is right for you.

Sentence 2

Step 1: Write shorter sentences Our equipment finance options give you access to the latest technology without requiring a large outlay. Our vehicle finance plans take the pain out of managing corporate fleets. Step 2: Improve language and sentence length Our equipment finance lets you use the latest technology without have to pay up front. Our vehicle finance plans will help you manage your corporate fleet.

Sentence 3

Step 1: Write shorter sentences ABC Telco has commissioned the first detailed independent body of research on productivity among leading Australian business and government organisations. This will help us identify and deliver productivity improvements to our customers. Step 2: Improve language and sentence length We have funded the first independent research on productivity in leading Australian businesses and government. It will help us provide a more efficient service to our customers.

Sentence 4

Step 1: Write shorter sentences XYZ University offers credit for successful or partial completion of Diplomas or Advanced Diplomas. Students from TAFE and other institutions can fast-track their undergraduate degree. Step 2: Improve language and sentence length We offer credit for subjects you finished in a Diploma or Advanced Diploma. This means you can finish your degree faster.

Sentence 5

Step 1: Write shorter sentences We will advise you on whether the blood alcohol reading was accurate, whether time limits were observed and whether your case could be defended or the seriousness reduced. We will discuss with you what it means to be a disqualified, suspended or cancelled driver. Step 2: Improve language and sentence length We will check if your blood alcohol reading was correct and if police met time limits. If not, we may be able to argue against the charge or have it reduced. We will also discuss with you what it means to be a disqualified, suspended or cancelled driver.

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